Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Sweet Nothings

Last night, the lucky old Buzzard got to go to famed chef Stephan Pyles' restaurant for dinner with some people from work. He seemed disappointed when he called to deliver the news. Buzzard hates restaurants where he can't understand the descriptions of foods on the menu. He's at home with words like "meat" and "potatoes", and if a menu comes in the form of a glowing neon board and mentions the word "supersized" it is even better.

This happens fairly regularly. Buzzard gets "dragged" to some five star dining utopia and suffers through an evening of seared foie gras and tamale tarts with roasted garlic custard and peekytoe crab when he would far rather be at home wearing his golden retriever sweatshirt and eating Wolf brand chili from a can. Now, I wouldn't trade one minute of my job as a Mom and I am so thankful that I get to stay home. But I can confess here in blogging secrecy that I do long to see the inside of one of those fancy restaurants and to taste some of that very fine food. That sounds like soooo much fun to me.

I studied Stephan's menu online and predicted just what my man would order, and with the exception of the salad, I got everything spot on. I was sure he would go for the Caesar, but he said the jalapeno polenta croutons scared him away. He opted for the farmstead cheese salad with lavender infused watermelon and walnut brittle instead. I will not mention that I could feed a family of six for two days on the cost of that salad because it might sound spiteful. Also because it might be a slight exaggeration.

I also had fun imagining what I would order if and only if I were going to be eating Stephan Pyles' famed cuisine instead of cheddar infused macaroni a'la Kraft. As much as I tease Buzzard about his love for uncomplicated foods, I'm not sure I would have a clue how to order off that menu either. Cardamom scented roasted suckling pig?? Huh? I'm a lactating mommy, so I feel certain I couldn't eat anything that is (or was) a "suckling". Yeesh.

Anyhoo....it was just another notch in his fine cuisine belt, and in a valiant effort to be sweet and accommodating, he brought home two desserts for me. Two desserts!! It was kind, and generous, and oh-so-very unfortunate that he forgot I gave up sweets for Lent! I held them, and smelled them, and photographed them, and fed them to my children, and asked for a detailed account of how every single layer tasted. Buzzard didn't even try a single bite. He wasn't remotely interested, but he did get rather excited about the double stuff Oreos on the counter.

I love that man. He makes Easy To Please an art form. :)

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