Monday, February 23, 2009

Kicking Crabby to the Curb

I'm not entirely sure how a one day break from blogging accidentally became a two day break, which then somehow turned into a three day break; but I do know that days four and five disappeared in the blink of an eye. Presto. One week was gone.

My blogging break was semi-intentional. Lately, I've been a real crab. I just couldn't seem to shake the gloomies. Truth is, I don't know how to put my sour slump into words other than to say I didn't want to be such a grump. I kept praying for a better attitude and a more patient spirit. I really wanted to lighten up, but I was just plain frustrated over anything and everything. The very fact that I couldn't seem to "hurry up and get in a better mood" was in and of itself annoying. I mean to tell you I was NO FUN. I knew very well that I was over busy, over tired, and under organized, and that taking time to intentionally address those issues would certainly help to rescue my mood. But I didn't want to work at anything because I was too crabby. It was just easier to whine about how my circumstances were conspiring against me. Which of course, they were not. But if you would have tried to kindly point that out to me the last few weeks I'd have had your head.

I swear I can throw a pity party that is the social event of the season.

So, in a nutshell, I needed a good word from the Lord on how to calm my anxious heart. That, along with perfect children, a clean house, and something covered in chocolate.

I settled on a word from my Lord. Actually, I feasted on many of them. This past weekend I attended a conference for homeschool moms. I prayed - begged, actually - for weeks that God would speak to me in a personal way at this conference and show me how to Stop! Being! So! Crabby!! I only asked Him for a word or two, but instead He just went ahead and designed the whole kit and kaboodle just for me. Honestly, the very first session was about finding the JOY in a life of faithful service. I basically just melted into my chair, took copious notes, hung on the speaker's every word, and enjoyed the warmth of joy as it crept into my heart and conquered the crabbies.

Oh, it was divine.

I'll definitely share more about the conference in days to come, but it felt great to come home, hug my imperfect kids, and be ready to welcome a new day in my messy but comfortable house. Today I made cinnamon rolls for breakfast, read an extra chapter in our read aloud, and lit a pretty little candle I've been saving for a special occasion. It feels good to be reunited with my keyboard, too. Obviously, life will never be perfect. Sometimes that reality breeds far more frustration and stress than it is worthy of. It is a blessing to get a dose of perspective, and to let the simple truths that should be obvious shift back into focus.

I'm back in the game. Let the blogging resume. :)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Oh thank goodness!

I don't know if you realize, but some of us check in here EVERY DAY, hoping for new pictures of my nieces (and I love that word when it's plural) and nephews to pull me out of my crabby mood.

Your posts mean a lot to me, and I really do look forward to reading them each morning!

PS-This is Stacy...:-)