Mount NeverRest

Are you completely horrified that I would air this much dirty laundry on a public domain? My Mother will be. I got behind on laundry, which is something I try really, really hard not to do. As you can see, it snowballs quickly. This is the one household chore that gets the best of me. There are so many frustrating things about laundry that I can not understand...

First, we all know about the force in the dryer that extracts a sock from every load. I wash hundreds of graying, threadbare and hole filled athletic socks, and every one returns to me with a mate. It is only the nice trouser socks or frilly, pretty baby socks that come back loners.

Second, why can't little boys learn the difference between a "dirty" shirt and shirt that has been worn for one hour? When I say "clean your room" why do they hear "shove everything into the hamper"? I promise you they think they live at "Dove's Fluff and Fold".

Third, why does every stage of laundry get progressively more difficult? Sorting is a chore because it involves a scavenger hunt through the house, turning everything right-side out, and the dreaded emptying of pockets. This used to be the fun part because I could hope for spare change, but whatever poultry sum I win these days is dreadfully overshadowed by the grossness of things that can be found in boy pockets. Even harder than the sorting is remembering to move each load from the washer to the dryer before it starts to stink. I have apparently reached an age where my short term memory fades faster than the perma press cycle on my front loader. Getting the clothes out of the dryer is even harder than putting them in, because the removal involves hanging and folding before wrinkles set in. This is important because I do not iron. Ever. Except when I sew. But only then. I finally bought a cute fabric cover for my ironing board and hung it on the wall in my laundry room as a decorative accessory. It is the final phase of laundry that challenges me the most. Putting it all away is the hardest part. That is why plucking through baskets of clean laundry to find something to wear is part of the survival skills here at the Manor.

It is while they are digging away that one boy is likely to say something like, "I can only find one sock!" To which his brother will most likely answer, "Well, if there's only one, than just throw it in the hamper!"